Thursday, December 16, 2010

Walk tall...or baby don't walk at all.

I am 25. Almost 26. A quarter century is a pretty damn good time to take a look back on all the things you've learned. Especially because most of them were learned the hard way. I do believe that there really is no other way to learn but the hard way. Pain and growth, they make us real people. So, these are some of the most important lessons I've learned in my 25 years.

1. "It is not advisable to venture unsolicited opinions. You should spare yourself the embarrassing discovery of their exact value to your listener." Ayn Rand.

2. It takes A LOT more effort than you might think to change yourself. It makes it all the more worthwhile to produce meaningful change. And that change can become an integral part of who you are.

3. The majority of people in your life only want you at your best. True friends are the ones who stay around when you're at your worst. They're the ones who can see your light through all your darkness.

4. There will be times when you feel like you can't go on, that nothing will ever be right again. Push through. The world will be so much more beautiful on the other side. And you will be stronger for it. As Beckett said "I can't go on. I'll go on. "

5. Gay men, just as much as straight men, like you better when you look good. For that matter, everyone likes you better when you look good. Whether they want to admit it or not.

6. To knowingly hurt someone is one of the most difficult things you will ever do.

7. We teach others how to treat us. "We accept the love we think we deserve."

8. Finding an end to something, laying something to rest, is an extremely difficult thing to do. Yet it turns out it is more painful to drag on that which should have ended long ago.

9. Emotion and the display of it, crying, laughing, hugging someone, human touch, these things are not weaknesses. Though society would have you believe they were. They require far more strength that being stoic.

10. There are some wounds that only time (and a lot of it) can heal. There is nothing you can do to rush the pain away.

11. It takes work to know yourself. The edict from Socrates "Know thyself", this is not a simple command. You must dig deep and venture into dark and frightening places to truly discover this. And the journey never truly ends.

12. The only person who can truly measure your success is yourself.

13. You will never understand why the masses choose the things they do, i.e. George Bush, The Jonas Brothers...The only thing you can do is keep an open mind and high standards and hope that others can see beauty where you can and vice versa.

14. People are the same everywhere. Generally, most want the same things, they just specify their personal desires.

15. Politics are a complete waste of time. They are not based in any sense of logic or rational.

16. "The world owes me nothing, we owe each other the world."

17. Even if you break everything. There is always time to rebuild. All we have is time.

That's all I've got for now. Perhaps I'll add more later. Anyone who reads this...what are the most important lessons you've learned so far?

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